To the last beat of His heart

Today started out beautiful.  The birds were singing, The sun was shining.  It was in the mid 60's and would be heading up to 70 or so today.  The first time since November.  

I had been up and down most of the night.  I even woke Mama up several times to get her to pet me.  She never seemed to mind me doing that.  She woke early and spent some time with me and then she slipped that magical collar around my neck.  It is orange, has Harley Davidson on it and Hattie Mae had sent it to me a bit ago.  I do not know why, but it was always the collar she put on me to go to the vet.  Usually I do my Smoochy dance, but not this morning.  I had reached a point where I was falling down a lot.  This appointment was just for a check up, but I knew different.  I just had to make sure that Mama knew it was time to let me go.

She opened the front door and I went ass over teakettle down the stairs.  *no clue where that comes from but Mama says it all the time, shrugs*  I got to the car door and just looked up at Mama.  She told me to get up and I put my front paws up on the car as best I could, then I looked up at Mama.  She knew that I needed help, so she got a hold of me, and somehow the top of my head connected with her nose.  Right on the bridge.  Oh boy.  I think I broke Mama's nose, but I looked back and there was no blood so I figure maybe a black eye or something.  I gave her the "sorry, Mama" look and she heaved me into the back seat.  

I love riding.  It is one of my favorite things to do.  Mama kept looking in the mirror to make sure she could see my nose.  And, it was there, peeking out over the glass.  I do not like the wind in my face, but I sure do love to snuffle the air in my nose.  I was in full on car mode everytime Mama looked.

We pulled into the vet and I got out, falling into a bundle as I did.  Mama helped me up and I limped into the vet's office.  I nodded to the sweet ladies that work behind the desk then collapsed on the floor waiting for my appointment.

I have always loved the vet.  Dr. Tom is an amazing person and he cares for his patients so well.  He bent down and petted me and he winced when he saw my leg.  Mama and he were talking in hushed voices, I kept looking between them.

Then I saw Mama's tears.  I looked up at her and she at me.  She knew that I was okay with whatever she decided, but I could tell what she had decided and I was okay with that as well.  I felt her wonderful hands on my head and Dr. Tom left and Mama and I spent some special time talking.  I reached up and licked the tears from her beautiful face and she knew when she felt my tongue on her cheek that it was okay.  I was okay.  I was ready.  Not to leave her, but to leave the pain that I tried to hide from her.

Dr. Tom came back in, and Mama took her place, her sweet hands caressing my head, her voice low in my ear telling me how much she loved me, how much she cared.  I just looked at her, my brown eyes full of love as they looked into her blue ones.  Then I felt the sting of a needle in my butt.  Mama's voice never stopped, I fell asleep hearing those words I have heard for the last 10 years and those soft hands caressing my cheeks and face.  

I felt a paw in mine, and looked.  It was Raja.  I knew her spirit would be there with me.  I felt another paw on the other one, it was Hattie Mae.  Then a cuddle on my side, it was Lily.  And there was Leo, Lou EEE, Pocket, River, the rest of the Labbies, JKWE they were all there in spirit.  All of my good and wonderful friends.  

Then I felt very softly, another sting and the last thing I saw was Mama's eyes, tear stained cheeks and felt her wonderful hands and love carrying Me from her love to the Bridge.  

The rest of the tale is for Angel Foley to tell.